purgatorystuck: Mi papá tiene 47 años= my dad is 47 years old Mi papa tiene 47 anos= my potato has 47 assholes I love spanish
mstryder: Maybe if period pain burned calories it would be worth it
I can’t tell if Amanda Bynes is really in need of help, or if she is pulling off the most amazing and fully committed Amanda show skit of her life
whisk-ey: If you want to call a family meeting just turn off the wifi router and wait in the room in which it is located.
donaldglover: if you’re having trouble finding a job make sure that you have “2006 time person of the year” listed on your resume. works every time.
bulimiasux: bulimiasux: I THOUGHT V CARD MEANT VISA CARD AND I TOLD MY SISTER I LOST MY V CARD AND SHE SPIT HER COKE EVERYWHERE this isn’t fucking funny anymore guys omfg
awesomephilia: Whoever put the ‘b’ in the word ‘subtle’ deserves a pat on the back
lpd-says-fuck-you: anorecsya: i wish my thighs were as small as my self esteem ✿◕‿◕✿ If you have tiny thigh, how will you crush head of man like sparrow’s egg between?
harryflack: call me old fashion but i think your shorts should be longer than your vagina
sexcake: sexcake: does anyone else feel 100x sexier when they wear matching bra and undies it makes me wanna rip my clothes off and show everyone but apparently that is frowned upon